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I have grapheme-color synesthesia. Basically I see letters and numbers in colors. The letter 'E' being green for example. A couple months ago I was explaining it to my boyfriend who's a bit of a skeptic. He asked me what colour certain letters and numbers were and had me write them down. Since then he'll randomly quiz me and compare my awnser to what I said a few months ago. Always being the sameish as course. He still seemed a bit skeptic as if maybe I just memeroized them really really well.

Tonight we were laying in bed and my boyfriend quized me again. I tried explaining to him I just see the colors automatically when I visualize the letters in my head. I asked him what colour are the letters in his head. He looked at me weirdly like what do you mean in "my head, that's not a thing"

My boyfriend didnt understand what I meant by visualizing the letters. He didn't believe me that I can visualize letters or even visualize anything in my head.

Turns out my boyfriend has aphantasia. When he tries to visualize stuff he just sees blackness. He can't picture anything in his mind and thought that everyone else had it the same way. He thought it was just an expression to say "picture this" or etc... Its crazy to him the fact that I can picture his face without looking at him or a banana without looking at it.

Now I have a boyfriend that is really upset. He feels like his world is turned upside down and every body else has this cool superpower. He's been texting all his friends and see if they can imagine stuff and realizing I wasnt pulling his chain. Hes pretty upset and I feel really bad.

Tldr tried to explain what having synesthesia is like to my bf and turned his life upside down by finding out he has aphantasia. (Cant visualize anything at all)

Edit; Oh wow this blew up. I just wanted to say my boyfriend wasn't being a jerk when it came to quizzing me, it was more of a fun curiosity thing/science experiment. He never thought I was lying. I think it's one thing to wrap your head around synesthesia when you can visualize normally but it's way harder when you have aphantasia.

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I guess it should be are “we” the assholes, but idk if that’s an accepted acronym here.

Apologies that the line up is a bit complicated but I’ll try to lay it out as best I can.

My family is going on a group vacation this summer. We are pooling our resources to rent a nice property on the beach for a week. My husband and I are (unfortunately) taking the lead on planning and organization.

It will be me, my husband and our two kids, my brother, his wife, and their 3 kids, plus my parents. (Kids’ ages range from 3 to 9). In addition, my sister, her husband and their girlfriend are invited.

We initially only invited my sister and her husband, but my sister insisted that their girlfriend (who I think they’ve been dating for 9 months or so) be included as well.

My sister is in a polyamorous relationship and, although my family and I don’t get all of the nuances, we have tried to be understanding. So as a compromise we said that her girlfriend could come, but we asked that everyone please refrain from any PDA in front of the kids. We were planning to just refer to the girlfriend as a friend of the family. My sister was not happy with this suggestion and is now, once again, saying that she will not go on the trip under these circumstances.

At this point, everyone else is exhausted with the subject and all for letting her exclude herself from the trip. I’m conflicted though. She’s my sister and I obviously love her. But I also think my other family members are trying their best in a touchy situation.

Are we wrong?


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